Monday, April 19, 2010

April Showers...Christ's love!

First section was written beginning of April:
So I ended up waking up after about 6 hours after that last post, in case you were wondering, oh well. Currently I'm at home and hoping to go back tonight so I can do work and not get too far behind. I hate being sick so much! It's frustrating.
Update on last month stuff:
-I've gotten to talk to such a sweet friend as she's traveling, I can't wait to visit her and explore with her! She's almost to her final destination.
-I got to ride my horse and spend time at the barn Saturday! Such a much needed time to myself.
-My Bestfriend is enjoying his job, and has to make a future decision soon, so prayers would be appreciated
-My brother had a full-time job for 3 days then they let him go, :( I know there's a reason and I'm trusting God to provide.
- I think my tests went alright.
- D-Now was amazing! God taught me a lot. The girls and the other leaders were amazing! I'm so blessed I got to be a part of the weekend.
- Beach Reach was soo cool! Challenging and better than ever. I had an amazing group and leader to go with! I had some amazing times of prayer and laughter with God. I love Him! It's so awesome to think God laughs with us.
- My first interview did not result in an offer but I think it's for the best. So, I'll keep searching and trust God to provide a position that would be glorifying to Him no matter what it'd be.
- Baptisms, not judgmental, joyful at how God is using other ministries

Now mid-April is here...
goodness, time is flying! Let's see what all's happened since then:
- super fun bachlorette for a great friend
- Easter!
- registered for Summer last undergrad semester
- lunch with my bestfriend when we were kids
- dinner with one of my best highschool friends
- last season of flag-football in progress
- My favorite boy's birthday
- my Mom's birthday
- Thrashers game
- My Bestfriend accepted a job!
- tons of review sessions and the biggest test of my life to date (8 hours)
- lots of projects, meetings, hw, and classes
- Rehearsal dinner, wedding, and reception for an amazing couple. I'm so glad I got to be there for the dinner and end of the reception (stupid test was during the wedding, frustrating)
- My sweet friend has made it to her home, Cali so excited! I can't wait to talk to her soon! (School gets in the way too much!)

May I just weddings are interesting, more of what comes around them, the conversations, people; it gives you lots to think about.

What's to come:
- Today presentation and last assignment for 1 class
- Today induction ceremony
- Tomorrow last mentor event and last bcm thingy
- Wed. quiz?
- Thursday presentation and last assignment due for another class
- Saturday hopefully going to see a tunnel being built near me
- dead Monday presentations and last assignments for another class (Chuck!)
- dead Tues, flag football semi-finals
- dead Wed. Senior Design Presentation scary!
- dead Thurs. flag-football finals
- dead Fri. senior party
- Sat. Dixie Season Opener
- final mon.
- final tues.
- final thurs.
- move out
- sat. friends' graduations
- then 2 weeks a fly to summer classes!!! so close AHHHHH
- then 7 full weeks and I'm back
- THEN 4 WEEKS TO GRADUATION aka 104 days 'til I'm DONE!

All of this is so exciting and scary, I'm trusting that God will carry me through like He's done before. He is all I need, though I forget and try to do it on my own so often.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

March Madness! (I know unorignal, oh well :P)

So, all of my roomies are still up and I mean wide-awake. Oddly enough I'm not at all tired so far this semester I've had a really hard time staying up past midnight, no clue why. It feels strangely good to still be up. I, also, have the plus to not feel guilty about it since my 2 official classes (8 and 9:30) are both canceled today! Now all I have is Senior Design starting at 1:30pm. This month has started off calm unexpectedly, I was anticipating being behind and being slammed. I'm still "behind" in a couple classes but it's not terrible, or at least in my Senioritis mind it appears that way. April will be nuts! But before we get there let me speaking more about March.
This month:
- I've said goodbye to a dear friend I won't see for several months(It just reminds me how much I miss those who I've already not talked to in forever!)
- my horse was sick and I couldn't go home (he's better now)
- my bestfriend has started a job!
- my brother has got a full-time job again!
- I'm halfway through classes for the semester
- I've taken my first test in one class and have the first test for 3 more classes next week
- I'm helping to lead a small group of girls for a D-Now weekend (I'm terrified and excited!)
- Spring Break is the week after next and I'm going on a mission trip (super pumped and can't wait to see what God does!)
- I've started the job search and application process (hope I can find something somewhere)
mmm I think that covers through the end of March. Then comes April filled with lots of deadlines, aaahhhh and an 8 hour test! I'm not so worried about all the projects grade-wise I just don't want to have to choose between spending time with friends and working on school work. As my last real semester (I won't be here for my last semester) I want to enjoy everything and spend time with those I love before we spread out. I'm so grateful that God is in control and He is my hope. I'm soo blessed to be loved! God is amazing, even is classes go horribly from here on out or my plans are destroyed, I know I will be safe in His arms! I'm excited about what He's got in store for me and those I love!
"He led me to a place of safety; He rescued me because He delights in me." -Psalm 18:19
"Shake Well, Settling is Natural"

... I think I'll go to bed now, though I could stay up and probably get stuff done, I don't think people would appreciate me being tired in a meeting though. ... Should I set an alarm and get up early and work or see how much sleep I can get? Let's find out! :P

Monday, February 22, 2010

post for February

Since the previous post was not exactly what I prefer for my monthly post, here is something less interesting ;).

February so far has been fun, busy with classes and life. Nothing to complain about. (Oh by the way, I'm proceeding with my trip this summer and using a loan not my preferred choice.) I'm getting a severe case of senioritis, I'm reaching the point of counting points I'll get taken off in order to avoid hw. It's bad definitely not something I'm proud of, hopefully I'll get a handle on it soon. I'm ready to be done with classes not necessarily the schedule and flexibility that come with being in college. I'm beginning my job search again. There's a career fair I'm going to this week, wish me luck.
I can't think of much to write about, maybe I'll write more before the month ends.

Here's a fun story that happened to me yesterday:
The weather was gorgeous finally after lots of cold, so a friend and I went to the local park to just be outside. We'd been in the spot on the hill for over an hour and had discussed plans to get food at the restaurant at the corner of the park. As we were people/dog watching this guy sits down just past my friend about 10ft away. We continue chatting and watching, then in a lull in our conversation this guy says "You have pretty feet" to me. .....uh.... I respond "Thank you?" and start freaking out in my head. My friend and I quickly revert back to commenting on dogs around us. Then 5 minutes later or so he asks: "Can I see the bottom of your feet?" ....uh...uh... sheepishly I say: "No." Now my friend and I are both so confused, who says that? We wait a few more minutes to try and avoid making it obvious that we were a little creeped out. Then we get up and head to the restaurant to get a reservation. As we walk alongside the park, we keep glancing back to check and see if he's following us. We just laugh it off and wonder about why/who says something like that. (Hint: Guys this is not a good pick-up line ever!) We get to the restaurant put our name down and go sit on the hill next to it to wait out the hour. Think the story's done? Oh no, there's more! My friend leaves me to go to the restroom and I pull out my notebook to do some more studying a minute later I notice someone sit down about 10 ft away, you guessed it same guy! I quickly glanced over realized it was him and buried myself in my notebook. He stayed for about a minute then got up and walked away. I couldn't believe it, my friend and I had joked about him following us, but neither of us believed it would happen. After the guy got some distance away I whipped out my camera to prove to my friend he'd been there. My friend came back and I told her what happened and showed her the picture, then we just laughed that's all we could do. Needless to say we enjoyed the rest of our time with no more appearances by the guy. Craziness!

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Dire need of help

So this is not my typical post but ...
I'm not normally one to publicly ask for help(a pride issue of sorts), but I don't know what to do. I guess this is also a vent/lament.
Background: I'm in my last year (5th) of my college undergrad degree earning a bachelors in civil engineering. I've co-oped (worked every other semester) for a total of 5 full work terms and one part-time term. This until the past year has allowed me to pay for school by myself for the most part. My parents have helped out when I couldn't afford it(freshmen year, I hadn't had a real job yet, and the past 2 semesters, when the economy tanked it limited the amount of hours I could work thus limiting the money I could earn).
Problem: I'm in my 2nd to last semester and am currently trying to figure out my last semester. I've been accepted into a Study Abroad program that would be an awesome opportunity to broaden my horizons and something I'd be looking at for years. It costs about 1.5 times as much as a normal semester for me. I CAN'T afford it without help. I've been looking at scholarships many of which I can't qualify for and most won't award the money until a couple weeks before my trip leaves or some after. A lot of the money is due now several months in advance due to making reservations for flights, hotels, matriculation fees, etc. This is what is causing the biggest problem for me.
Now, I've got to find a way to come up with the money or I'll have to withdraw the program and find classes here to take during the summer or maybe even have to wait until the fall because I can't afford tuition. Oh, by the way I don't qualify for loans because my parents make "too much" money. Which, is not a true statement since they had to take out loans to help me pay for this semester and the previous one.
Admission: I'm not poor, by the world's standards I'm rich. This is a dream of mine and I don't forsee another opportunity like this occurring ever again for me. I've been able to do a lot of stuff throughout my lifetime, a whole lot more than the rest of my family. As far as I know I will "make it" farther in my life than anyone in my family has ever been able to. I know I'm complaining to an extent and life isn't fair, but I thought by putting it out there maybe someone will be able to help me.
Irony/Grace: I'm a Christian and try to do daily Bible studies. Currently I've been reading about how God provided for the Israelites in the desert (lot bigger problem, even less possiblity of a solution). I know God is in control and He's plans and timing are better than mine could ever be. So I'm trusting that He has a purpose for me whether it be going or not. Here are 2 verses I was reminded of yesterday (before I really started panicking):
"He led me to a place of safety; He rescued me because He delights in me."-Ps. 18:19
"In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps."-Prov.16:9
There's a similar verse to the last one to which keeps going and ask the Lord to "Correct my steps" I pray that God will correct my steps and my attitude. I will bless His name no matter the outcome. I pray my selfishness will not overcome who God wants me to be.

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Look I'm early

Look I'm kinda early on making a post for the month!

I had an awakening today. A realization that I have habits that have become instinct. Some good and some bad. I've been trying something new for a set amount of time. Today I messed up, I failed, I broke my goal. The most disturbing thing was that I didn't realize it until halfway through. I felt ...guilty, ashamed, lost, relieved I caught myself, blown away, etc. It was so instinctive I never realized I had a habit that could be that way. I'm still trying to grasp the full meaning. It has made me wonder what else is in my life is like that. I haven't figured out anything yet but I'm working through it.
I pray this sticks with me for along time and bugs me forcing me to grow.

Friday, December 25, 2009

A gift

Wonder of it All

The greatest season for a child
Christmas brings so much to see
the presents, food, family, and lights
the youngest so tiny and small
first to bed, first to rise
to find the tree so tall
beauty and memories shining from every branch
the child overjoyed, so excited runs to tell all
their presents have come
ready to take a place in their hearts.

The child knows best;
to see through His eyes
is the greatest gift.

The magnificent season for all
when Christ came for us to see
the grace, love, Father, and the light
the weakest so sinful and tall
first to misstep, first to rise
to find the cross finished all
picked up and made new seeing the blood on the branch
the sinner overjoyed, so excited runs to tell all
the Savior has come
ready to take a place in their heart!
Written by AEH 12/25/09

Merry Christmas!
I hope you're reminded of the greatest gift ever given.

Monday, November 16, 2009

J-group Discussions

Side Note before the actual post: Please pray for me: I have a test tomorrow at 7-9:30am for which I have done virtually no studying, but most importantly for wisdom in making a decision and the courage to stand by it not regretting anything. Thanks

A rough slightly edited set of emails and thoughts...

> ----- Original Message -----
> From: Abbie
> Sent: Tuesday, October 27, 2009
> Subject: J-Group Meeting
>
> "Only those who have wrestled with a silent God are ready to hear Him speak again"
>
> So this entire time we've been searching for God's Will we've kind of glanced over the one thing that probably frustrates us the most- when we're looking for His Will, but God is silent. I think that we've kind of already hit on this topic in our conversations- which is why I am that much more excited about specifically talking about it again. It could just be me, but I feel like this is a really relevant topic to discuss.
>
> So who would you think is the one person in the world that has never experienced silence from God? Jesus? Wrong. :) we will be lookng at Christ this week and seeing exactly how God's own son dealt with silence from God- and how we can handle it in our own lives.
>
> First off I think that there are really two kinds of silences one can experience from God. There's the one that you just pain out feel abandoned. You're in trouble, you're trying to make important life decisions and you need God- now! And it feels like He's no where to be found. Read Matthew 4:1-11. Jesus is tempted by Satan in the wilderness. God was silent when Jesus was tested- and Jesus was tempted in some pretty big ways. Sometimes I think that God uses His silence to test our hearts- to see what we're really made of.
>
> Then there's the other silence that comes more from our own disobedience and/or questioning God's plan. Read Matthew 26:36-46. Jesus is in the garden and he is asking God to essentially "rethink" what He had to do. But God remained silent. Sometimes I think that God gives us an answer and then remains silent while we wrestle with what we then have to or not do.
>
> Speaking of wrestling :) The last Biblical reference for this e-mail is in Genesis 32:22-32. Jacob wrestles with God- literally. Do you ever feel like when God is silent- that's also the times when we wrestle with Him the most?
>
> What are the main things you deal with during the times that God is silent?
>
> I can't wait to see what you all have to say about all of this.
> Abbie

On 10/29/09 11:17 PM, wrote:

Hey Ladies,
After our discussion tonight, I was doing some more reading in a book I was given about Intimacy with God. I haven't really looked much into it until tonight, but what I read I felt was relevant. So here some thoughts from the book, hope it's helpful.
~
Thoughts:
"Whom have I in heaven but You? and there is none upon earth that I desire besides You." ~Psalm 73:25

Come near to the holy men and women of the past and you will soon feel the heat of their desire after God. They mourned for Him, they prayed and wrestled and sought for Him day and night, in season and out, and when they had found Him the finding was all the sweeter for the long seeking. -A.W. Tozer [I really like the phrasing in this quote, I'm not sure what he meant initially by in and out of season but to me I feel this applies to the times when God's silent.]

There is a restlessness deep within each of us that compels us to search for the person, the place, the job, the "god" that will fill the void and give us peace. This restlessness drives us to find someone who will love us for who we are, understand our fears and anxieties, affirm our worth, and call our lives into account. To admit our need for and dependence upon God requires humility and vulnerability, which paves the way not only for knowing God, but also for becoming intimate with Him. Deepening intimacy with God is the outcome of deep desire.
May this prayer of David's become our own:
Hear my cry, O God; Give heed to my prayer. From the end of the earth I call to Thee, when my heart is faint; Lead me to the rock that is higher than I. For thou hast been a refuge for me, A tower of strength against the enemy. Let me dwell in they tent forever; Let me take refuge in the shelter of thy wings.
-Psalm 61:1-4

Other suggested readings: Psalm 62, 63, and 73 as well as Isaiah 26:9 and Philippians 3:7-11

Sorry that this is just direct quotes from a book, but I couldn't think of a
better way to rephrase it. Hope it helps in some way!
~